Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Feast Beast!

I really can't figure out why I weigh about 3 hundred and 30 pounds!?

Seriously I work on my seated booty all the time - I love to chill out and go out to eat with friends and I only hike to and from my car form the house or work or the store so I think I need to share with you who's fault it is.

WORK! It can't be MY fault so I blame my job! HAHA!

OK seriously - for NO reason at all I brought in two bags of popcorn for all of us tonight that my sister popped. (Tonight she popped it on purpose for me to take in to work but last night she actually hadn't used the machine before and it popped all over the whole kitchen and exploded the top of the machine full of popped fresh kernels and the floor was covered! The dog loved this though) So again 2 lunch sacks full of fresh popped popcorn on our center table - then my co worker just brought in a plate full of white chocolate covered pretzels... YUM - and now my boss needs me to help her carry the crock pot of taco soup she's got in the kitchen so we can all enjoy it! And there's no birthday or event other than we all wanted to bring in food and if everyone eats it we don't feel so bad! Because everyone around us is eating it all too! LOL


LORDY!




Here's Mandi cleaning up last nights mess!

Our puppy is helping her! lol
Notice the popcorn on the counter and floor and the lid is hanging on barely!

Friday, March 27, 2009

King Soopers Games!

King Soopers is the local Grocery store of choice. Who's choice? Mine. I grew up going there so it's more of habit than anything. I could choose the Safeway across the street - or the Albertsons down the road... but I usually default to the King Soopers.

The other night on our way back from Colorado Springs for a family getaway, my sister Mandi, my boyfriend Mike and I decided to stop for a few things before settling in at home. Nothing too exciting happened, we checked out a hot beefy tattooed guy who kept popping up wherever we were (AND who Mike and I totally got busted checking out when we first saw him!) we shopped and then we began to head out of the store.

As Mandi and Mike lead the way I was called to attention by this guy who'd pulled his cart full of groceries over to the side and began yelling to us.

"HEY! Guys.... can I talk to you?"

Mike kept walking and Mandi was halfway to the car. I'm thinking that I'm too close and had already made eye contact so I couldn't just ignore this obvious sales person.

We're in the suburbs so it's not often you get gaggled by people wanting money from you at the store... well other than those needy little girl scouts when they're selling cookies.

The guy introduced himself (Names forgotten already) and he shook my hand and followed as I kept a pace (slower than the original but still car bound) to help unload the items into Mike's car.

He asked me if Mike and I would be interested in playing for this football team that he owns?

FOOTBALL? I know I should be all butch and manly and into it but honestly I don't even get the game... I've tried - it just never stuck. I explained to him as we kept walking through the parking lot that I don't even like football.

"Seriously? Wow... I bet the two of you together would be an amazing force!"

OK When he said that I went mentally to pure porn! I couldn't help it - and yes there were shoulder pads involved in my thoughts... but not football. PORN!

I withheld my thoughts and comments other than to say... "yeah not into it but thank you though"

He said thanks and shook his head like we had let him down... ruined his day.

Then I hear Mike at the car with my sister as they are putting the groceries into the trunk as he says... "I like penis.... I like penis"

I know many gay guys who still like football but it made me chuckle. - I guess that guy shops for all sorts of beef when he's at the store. ... HAHA!~ So do we.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

I Copied the Story but Added the Picture!

LEXINGTON PARK, Md. - A Southern Maryland woman was seriously injured in a mishap involving a sex toy over the weekend. The case was first reported on BayNet.com, and Saint Mary's County Public Safety sources confirmed the information to WUSA in Washington, D.C.

The accident was reported to local fire and rescue personnel about 1:30 a.m. on March 7, from an address on Rogers Drive. The man who made the 911 call said he had placed a sex toy over a saber saw blade, and then used the power tool on his partner, but the blade cut through the plastic and injured the woman.



The victim, a 27-year-old woman, was reportedly injured and bleeding. She was later flown to Prince George's hospital center by Maryland State Police helicopter.



County law enforcement officials who were familiar with the media report about this case said, although they were not initially called to investigate the incident, they would likely follow up to determine it was just an accident and involved consensual behavior.

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

No stabbings? No Lost dogs?


Some nights.. like tonight... something very rare happens at my work. It's SLOW. This is a great thing for the general public. This means we're not hearing from people being beat up ... overdosing .. suicidal callers I try to "talk down" ... lost dogs ... Car accidents ... Landing helicopters to transport almost dead people ... or like earlier tonight... people finding their loved ones have passed away.

Nope tonight things are smooth - I'm working with people I enjoy ... and we are caught up on paperwork ... I'm also geared up and ready to train another employee on a new channel next week - but for now ... I'm coloring! YEP! A co worker brought in some crayons and we printed out some free valentines day coloring sheets and here's my handy work!

Enjoy! I like the frog and the pig most I think!

I hope you're all safe!

Jerrod (AKA Freddy)

911 tips ...

Here is a cool guide blogged by an EMT about what to think about BEFORE you need emergency help! Cuz when you're IN the emergency... you're not thinking as clearly! Thought it'd be worth sharing.



Come to your rescue

"If you want EMT to arrive in time to save your life, you need to do more than just dial 911 and pray really hard. You also need to heed the findings of a recent study published in Academic Emergency Medicine and take these four steps to eliminate EMS obstacles.


"Show the way"


A wrong address is the most common reason emergency services are delayed, according to the study. After you give your address to 911, ask the dispatcher to read it back to you so you can correct any errors they (or you) might have made.


"This is misleading. Your phone number reveals your address to Dispatch unless you're on a cell. However, Dispatch only knows what they've been told. If you live on the corner, behind the garage, up the stairs in the back, second door on the right, give some directions or rescuers might spend some time milling around in the yard.

Flip the light on

"The right address won't do the EMT much good if they can't read your house or apartment number in the dark. Flick on every outside light. And take the time now — before you're clutching your chest — to install reflective house numbers.



"My service area is 110 sq miles with over 300 residents.(this is a very small number compared to many rural areas with thousands more residents) We have two subdivisions* with no posted house numbers and no street signs.** We have a few houses with a street address where there is no access from that street.*** Interesting, no? We have, a couple of times, zeroed in on the house with the lights on, and so far, haven't surprised someone just up for a midnight snack. If I -- someone relatively familiar with the area -- am sometimes confused,**** what chance to the city boys in the ambulance have? Clearly mark your house. Do not wait for local government to do it for you.X marks the spot"

Tell the dispatcher where you'll be inside the house.

You don't want them to waste time on a room-to-room search. Or have someone escort the EMT to your side; in the study, doing this cut 24 lifesaving seconds off the average rescue time."This hasn't been a problem for us. Usually, someone is standing on the porch, desperately waving and yelling, "Hurry up!" If you're alone, collapsed in your bedroom, holding your chest with one hand and the portable phone with the other, tell Dispatch where you are, and that you forgot to . . .

Unlock the door

"Obvious? In their panic, a lot of people forget to slide the bolt or turn the key. If you're alone and lose consciousness, the EMT will have to burn critical minutes trying to break down the door — or doors — to reach you. Give them a clear path."Yeah, we'll break down the door, but not before we've spent time making sure no one's coming to answer it, and then notifying Dispatch we're about to break into a house.***** You might want us in there sooner than that.My best advice... Take time to think about an emergency situation before you have one on your hands. Even the smallest consideration of what would I do if this happened -- will work in your benefit should you need help.



Here are some pics of me at work training on one of our many channels for one of our agencies - I swear she loves working with me! LOL Hope these tips were helpful!

Oh My Goodness I'm fat! How fat do you have to be!?

OK So I have always had HUGE legs - like huge muscle legs - thick ripped thighs with some you know... padding - but HUGE my calves are the size of some people's heads... but I am now FAT!

I've been putting on more weight this last year or so and it's driving me nuts - but not nuts enough to go to the gym I guess or to eat healthier and like a rabbit...

But I think last night may have been the last straw. I sat down to use the restroom and I think... THINK I "folded" a chunk of my thigh - I seriously think I sat on my leg fat!? OMG It hurt so bad and I had just gotten home from work and it was like 1 30 in the AM so all except the dog were asleep in the house. I tried to keep quiet but not ... NOW it hurts to walk sometimes and I try to act like it's not true.. that I must have hurt it some how other than that... Oh heck.

I need to figure this out... I need to keep my looks up at least a little! LOL

Sunday, February 1, 2009

And that ladies and gentlemen is why i'm fat...

So remember that place Gunther Toody's I told you about? YUP the one that made me almost lose it... orally .... well they redeemed themselves without knowing they needed to.

I was with my younger sister Mandi and my partner Mike for dinner and they decided we should go there. We did and we were glad to find out our waitress was a girl who's ALWAYS on the ball with her orders and she's speedy and friendly and easy to relate to ... without being overly aggressive! Her "work name" (which they all have fake names if you recall like Gidget ... or Flo) is cute too - it reminds us of one of our favorite characters on the show Pushing Daisies. I won't say it though for fear her bosses read my lovely blog.

Well she hooked our food up perfectly - and she had our drinks refilled before we knew we needed it (HUGE IN MY BOOK) and she didn't let us wait for anything it was right away and fast - She sat down to chat with us some too which was nice rather than annoying.

Well then we're done and she offers us a brownie... on her! (No pervert not eating it off of her body but she'll pay for it! Sheesh!)

We were mid sentence declining when she offered the nice discounted price... this girl hooked us up though. It wasn't any brownie or even any brownie sundae. Nope! She had double sized the brownie portion... which was thick as a cake... she then covered it in melted fudge topping... THEN covered THAT in frosting from the cinnamon rolls .... THEN added two huge scoops of Vanilla bean ice cream and before she was done she sprinkled spoons full of broken up Reese's peanut butter cups (I think) over the top of that! OH WOW it was delicious! Oh and she had whipped cream on top of that with some cherries. WOW!

So needless to say this time I needed to vomit but for a good reason... I ate too much!