A Day After Turkey

I have worked many odd hours and many jacked up schedules in my life. I rarely get a shift that is a day time shift - or weekend days off ... that would be a blessing - but I am thankful I have a job and like what I do. Hard times come when (and other shift workers will get this!) when it's holiday or birthday time... or time for that big event everyone has been planning for... and you will either get to; A) make a cameo appearance before heading to work. B) Stop by after work if it's not too late. or C) try to make it next year.

This year was hard - I'm working 5 8 hour days (which is rare I usually have had 4 ten hour days each week or 3 12-hour shifts each week) so it's a blessing and a curse - My days off are Sunday and Monday - so THIS week while Americans were blessed all over the place for a "short work week" and thankful for Wednesday to be the last day they would have o go in to work this week... I was thinking.. DANG IT It's only my 2nd day this week -I still am not even half way.. DARN IT!

However - I reminded myself... if I didn't have wonderful people in my life - My friend and family - who I will miss time with, it wouldn't matter anyway... so I'll be thankful I actually am surrounded by people who would miss me and who I would miss.

YET My friends and family worked it for me this year!!!! I got to go to my friend Frank's house hours before work - eat with friends - My mom and sister stopped by... and I still had time for a small piece of Pie before work!

The day went by fast and it was rather slow... Being a 911 dispatch center we get kind of used to dramatic things coming in. Annually we draw a turkey on our white board and for each turkey fire we have a tail feather gets colored in... this year was a "one-feather" year... boring in the dispatch center but I think a "one feather year" is something to be thankful for if you're the general public! It means out of all the thousands and thousands of homes - only ONE caught on fire from frying - baking cooking or what have you.. .to a turkey!

It's now the day after turkey day and it's still turkey comatose in the dispatch center - few drunk holiday party's here and there but good thing about this holiday -0 we're all thankful for things we normally overlook and it sedates the crime - turkey induced peace!

I'm thankful for so much and I hope you are too! No matter which country you are from!
Have a great day!

I can't twitter?

I try to twitter but some people say they don't get it. I "get it" ... it's a chance to start conversation using limited amounts of characters. Just like I do on Facebook

Unlike Facebook though I don't have all the other freaky games or comments or pictures to go along with it unless I link to another website.

The reason I think about this is I find myself evaluating my day to day actions and mentally contemplating if what I JUST DID is mentionable... and then... if it is... is it MENTIONABLE ENOUGH to replace my last status update!? I do it on Facebook and I've done hundreds on Twitter too but I find keeping up with BOTH rather a drag!

Am I supposed to duplicate the SAME status for both? (I've done this many times by simply "copy and paste"-ing the info before accepting it) but then I feel a little less genuine about - like, "Well it's already been printed on this site so am I fraudulent if I re post it on THIS site?"

But if I were to update my status I'd say I just performed on command for a coworker who held her video phone up to my face and I wonder if she'll put it on YouTube." I DID this! I sang Olivia Newton John on command.

But I like my two active statuses that have been getting non stop comments today so I'm using my blog now to mention other mentionables for my day. Hmmmmm.

Enjoy.

:::now heading to facebook to comment about blogging about twitter:::

Too Big to Enjoy the Vue!

DUDE... today was a great day for my family. We spent the morning with my Mom car shopping. She loves my cute nerdy Saturn Vue - it has space to lug stuff - it has nice clearance for when the snow falls here - and it's way nicer than her old VW Jetta which has been a bad omen since the day she and my Dad got it 11 years ago! HELL I tell you!

Anyway... my partner Mike rode in the car with my Mom making sure they didn't hear or see anything or feel any sort of things that my sister Mandi and I might have missed if we took the test drive with her! .... (we'd be blinded by the idea that this car is nicer than hers and tell her to just get it!)

When they got back from the test drive my mom mentioned it had the ability in the drivers seat to raise and/or lower!!!! Well, of course I KNEW THAT!!!!! Yes yes I did! And truly.. I DID know that...

What I didn't realize was that over the last 3 years I've had my car, I would sometimes reach down to my left and pull the lever to lean my seat forward or backward... it's a four door so this usually only occurred when someone else drove the vehicle.

Sometimes it seemed broken. It wouldn't work. Well that's because I had been raisin my seat without knowing it and slowly over the years I'd set it to the very highest setting and THIS Explains a lot.

See, I'd been thinking my weight gain from quitting smoking and from over eating and lack of exercise had all of a sudden started to cause me to be too big for my car. It was hard to get in and out of the car... I had to literally bend my head down sideways to be able to see when the traffic lights change.

Thing is... I've always been a big kid. ALWAYS! People thought my mother had a baby who was slightly retarded because when I was 4 months old I wore clothes that were size 18 months! SO I looked like a year and a half old child who should be walking and rambling but since I was only 3 or 4 months old in reality I was a HUGE Lump of chubby baby! I just layed there in her undersuzed motherly arms and I stared at people. I smiled a lot though!

I was so fat as a baby that I never crawled! I had to roll from place to place! HAHA! I couldn't bend my legs to crawl!

I have ALSO been "too fat" to ride rides too at amusement parks! ... well... I should say too large. When they lower the "over the head" safety bar for me on a ride... it doesn't always even touch my belly... it can't be pressed down over my shoulders enough to latch (And lemme say when it is, it hurts!)

But I'll take the pain to avoid the embarrassment of being told to get off the ride because I was too big! I thought this was going to happen in my own car!!! MY OWN CAR!!!!! I'm all of a sudden too large for my vehicle!

I was trying to figure out who would be the "ride operator" for my car!? Like who would walk over to me in the Mall Parking lot one day with a "height measuring stick" in a striped colorful "ride operator uniform" and break the news to me that I was too large to ride in my very own car.

Thankfully it didn't happen! Wahooooooo - So today when I'd said goodbye to my family and we went our separate ways... I pumped down my driver seat and it lowered SO MUCH that I almost feel too low! Like I was "Low Ridin" in my hot new Saturn Vue!

This also means I'm NOT Alice in wonderland who bit off the wrong side of the candy and outgrew my car...

Sometimes Old knowledge helps on new situations! Life is good! ... Relax Sit back and Enjoy the Vue

(Here's Moms New Car, It's Black)

Furry Gay Guys Do Dallas!

I am so excited to say ........ I Got My Script for the Scene we'll be doing in our series of Videos!!!! No Not Porn ...Calm down Mom! Sheesh!

No we're acting out scenes from the show from the 1980's ... Dallas!

Re-enacted by a burly collection of furry gay "bears" from Denver ... can't wait... It's just in pre-production at this time but seeing the script for my first scene where I play PAM - a character normally acted by Victoria Principal... in my GMail inbox makes my "junk" tingle! Can't wait!

FurryGayGuysDoDallas

911 Conversation

Call Taker (Me): "911 what is your emergency?"

Caller (them): "I don't want 911 but my phone is shut off can you pay my phone bill for me?"

Me: I'm sorry this is 911. I can't pay your phone bill you'll have to use a phone that works to contact your phone company.

Caller: I am going to be late to work and I need to let them know can you just call my phone company for me and pay my bill?

Me: Um, no I can't if you'd like I can transfer your call to a work number if you like but otherwise you... (Interrupted)

Caller: (Upset now) NO! I don't need you calling my work for me or trying any fancy footwork! Just PAY MY BILL so my phone works it won't let me do it myself!!"

Me: Sir this is 911 ... your phone bill is NOT an emergency. If there is no other emergency I can send a police officer to your house and he can tell you how to use a land line.

Caller: Screw You!

Me: No thank you sir is there anything else I can help you with tonight that pertains to the proper uses of calling 911?

CLICK::

Sad thing is.. he called back - spoke to 2 other people some multiple times trying to get us to pay his phone bill? Am I jaded? Is this not ridiculous to most people?

Hoodie Whoooooooooooo!

JD Hoodie the traveling Hoodie has finally made it to his next destination! Palm Bay Florida! He's visiting with a cute couple of bears down there... Chaz and Bill and meeting many new friends... having PLENTY To drink to help him relax from such a long commute from Melbourne Australia where he visited Kez the Mutton Chopped Mutant.

Let's see some pictures and enjoy!

this picture is behind the bar "helping out"


Here we have Hoodie getting a bit of excitement revved up with the crowd on the Mic!


um... Pole Dancing which lead to.....


Making New Friends!? Buddy's? Pals? .... having fun.


Laying out in the sun - relaxing off the night before.... Having a drink... that orange thing is a water gun full of suntanning lotion.. that's how we do it here!


now THIS we didn't think about... Hoodie Porn! YIKES! Better give this guy some privacy!

Hoodie Times! More to come in the Adventures of "JD Hoodie the Traveling Hoodie!"

See these pictures & more from: past present & future of JD Hoodie's travels around the globe @
www.facebook.com/JDHoodie

In Honor Of Bacon Everywhere....

I still have yet to try the new Baconnaise... I NEED to try it! Anyone seen any lately they'd like to share?

I've blogged about Baconnaise before and it's a Bacon Flavored Mayo that is less sodium and less fat content than regular Mayonnaise. If you use it on a BLT (Bacon Lettuce and Tomato) Sandwich it'll be less a LOT of things but I've been told (By Oprah and friends) NOT Less on FLAVOR!!!!!!!! YUMMMMMM!

Ok so I have a wallet that looks like it's made with raw strips of Bacon... People KNOW I love the stuff...it keeps me in shape! (Round IS a shape so shut up!)

Anyway... My Boss Jackie was shopping at her local convenience store and saw a bag of these...

She HAD to get them and now I've been munching on them all week! YES Bacon Flavored Sunflower Seeds! Delish! They taste super salty but in a brief comparison their sodium content is somewhat less than that of regular flavored Sunflower seeds! And it's made by the same company who developed Baconnaise and Bacon Salt (Which is a cool little start up company that began out of these guys' garage in Seattle Washington {Info again from my friend Oprah})

I dedicate this Blog to my friend Meghan who along with me has worshipped the likes of Bacon and Bacon products (And Billy Mayes may he R.I.P!)

Bacon Dress Looks (And Smells) Like Bacon